people go to work without anyone who understands
what is going on at home.
Because of the crucial nature of what needs to hap-
pen both in our personal and professional life, we had
to work things out. Some of the most well adjusted
people I know have been in recovery for 20�30 years
because they have had huge obstacles that they cannot
ignore like other people can. Through that struggle
they had to become well�adjusted people. That is what
has happened with us. We had to face things because
of the necessity of it. In many ways because we have
gone through so many struggles we have become
stronger, better partners. It has been more enhancing
than destructive to our marriage.
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hoped. I have high hopes that he will live an independ-
ent lifestyle. Evan's prognosis is even better.
veloped some interesting relationships. I can see him
ministering. He has influenced me to be different and
to have interactions with people that I wouldn't have
become involved with.
walls in our house until the day we died. It has been
quite a journey of faith to see that those fears were not
what we thought they were. As followers of Jesus, we
begin to see our burdens as opportunities for God to
do good things in our lives and to show His power.
mentally prepared for whatever direction things
might go in. We have goals in sight and how we get
there might veer from side�to�side and the goal
might shift and change. But having long term goals
has made such a difference for the enrichment of our
boys and the people who work with them.
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fend myself and my family, partly to raise aware-
ness, I try to get the message out.
home has allowed Mark to be his own man and really
come into his own. God led me in that direction and
that is where I stayed put, whether I liked it or not.
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home and at work?
which says that God has created me to be His work-
manship and that He has planned things for me to
best for me. I would not have chosen to have children
that are atypical. God has prepared amazing things
for us through those things. To be successful is to
know God's path, to trust Him and allow Him to do
His work.
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ways like boundaries, consequences and punishment.
Once we started entering the world of special needs
kids we were at the mercy of what doctors were
telling us. But we were in agreement. It is hard
enough for parents with neurotypical kids. I can see
how having special needs children can tear a mar-
riage apart. You can so easily go into the medical
blame game. Whose side of the family did this come
from? Then you start saying, "I can see where our
child got that." There is an opportunity to be very
ugly as you try and cope.
deal with things. When we are with each other all day
it is hard to put things on the back burner. While that
has made our marriage stronger, we have been forced
to be "different at work." In some ways it is stressful
to be with each other all the time, but in other ways it