War Cry - April 28, 2012 Page 10

WC:

How do you maintain a balance between your

two autistic boys and your neurotypical boys?

Major Noelle:

When the one�on�one behavioral thera-

pist comes in to work with Phillip and Evan that gives
me the time I need to tend to our other children. I can
work on homework with our youngest and when our
oldest comes home I am able to sit and talk about his
day. At 6:15, when those bedroom doors come open
and those sessions are over, the house is chaos. It took
a while before I was able to balance it completely. We
have to subtly integrate these things into our lifestyle
so that the neurotypical kids know how to react with
their brothers. It is tough.

Major Mark:

It is more natural at this point. We com-

partmentalize our time and our attention. Our chil-
dren get what they need. They might not get as much
as other children do. Collin went through a time in late
grade school where he struggled. I had to spend spe-
cific time with him and Noelle did, too. It is easier now.
.......................

WC:

What has been your greatest challenge?

Major Mark:

Acceptance of the situation, the circum-

stance. Acceptance of them as people. They are differ-
ent for sure. If you can trust God and believe that He
is good, that His purposes are perfect, it allows you to
see that there are pluses there that others don't have.
It's a hard journey to make and it takes time. We are
not finished with it nor will we ever be. It's a valuable
road to travel because it helps in so many other areas.
Major Noelle: It has also been acceptance as a Salva-
tion Army officer. I did not go to college so that I could
stay at home with disabled kids. I was able to make
peace with that. When Phillip was diagnosed we told
our leaders that as long as our child can get the help
he needs we will go anywhere, do absolutely anything,
even if it is not in our skill set. God will equip us.

We had the full support of Army leadership but the

support from our peers was sketchy. They knew that

for two years Mark had a desk job and I did not

come to work. I did not have to work, in their

opinion. For two years I had no assignment.
I was in limbo. I had forty hours a week of be-
havioral therapy to sit in on and hand�over�
hand learn how to do things with Phillip. If
you want to trade lives for a few years or

even just for a few minutes, be my guest!

.......................

WC:

What was the reaction from your family and friends?

Major Noelle:

My parents knew something was wrong

long before we knew what to do. After watching the
boys for a few days they pulled me aside and said
that Phillip was far more than just an angry and con-
fused child who didn't want to talk. They saw some-
thing far deeper and gave us their full support
emotionally and spiritually. They were heartbroken
for us and with us.

Major Mark:

My family was supportive as well. I have

a younger sister who is deaf so they had also gone
through having a child with a disability. We were in
denial for a while because we weren't ready to face
it. Our friends had a lot of empathy for us. They did
not really understand the situation and they didn't
really know what to say. It was a difficult thing for
them. We felt supported.
.......................

Philip's favorite person at
the Pasadena Tabernacle
(TAB) Corps is Martin
Hunt, who helps Philip be
accountable. Martin is the
Leader of the Tab Song-
sters, and the Assistant
Program Secretary for the
Western Territory.

Sarah Stillson, Junior Soldier
Sergeant at the TAB Corps,
encouraged Evan to enroll
in the Jr. Soldier prep class,
where he did well.

WarCry_APRIL28_Layout 1 4/3/12 4:20 PM Page 10