GOD
SM ALL
But that year I did not. Just a
few smaller items, none of them
capturing my imagination. I can
still remember, and even feel, the
childhood pain of my exclusion. My
three siblings had done far better.
I did not feel valued.
You might say, "Oh, this is only
typical sibling rivalry." I agree there
was comparison and competitive-
ness on my part. I'm also convinced
there was something else: a way of
validating my value as a person by
what I got. As a 10�year�old I was
I
was a sixth-grader and it was December 24th.
Every year of my childhood, this day was palpa-
ble with high expectation. Hope was a taste in
my mouth, an obsession possessing my mind.
What would Christmas morning bring this year?
There would be gifts for all of us four siblings, but
what would be my "big thing," the exceptional and
more expensive gift just for me? Every Christmas
each of us got that one outstanding thing, along with
a few other lesser gifts.
15
The War Cry | CHRISTMAS 2013
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